Menu
header photo

--Add your e-mail address here.

It’s My Life

It’s fascinating how music can transform us to a different place or another time. Just hearing the intense music and the haunting lyrics of a song today transported me into the darkness of another time—nighttime, sitting and sobbing in my car, contemplating the ongoing fear and trauma I had suffered.

I rationalized that he had only raped me that one time and had only punched me twice and how it had been a few years since then and he hadn’t hit me since. Suddenly, the lyrics, “it’s my life” pierced the airwaves, cutting through my thoughts just as I came to the realization that I had told myself I loved him so many times that I actually believed it. I didn’t love him; I simply didn’t love myself enough to leave.

I didn’t have the money to leave, or even much of a means to earn money due to illness, but at that moment I needed to leave. Not knowing how I could proceed, I set forth with little more than some clothes, a bed, and a miniscule bank account balance—little more than enough to cover first and last month’s rent. Somehow, I told myself, I would figure things out.

I still remember his words when I told him that I was never able to get over the fact that he had raped me years before, “Is that what you call it?” “No,” I stated emphatically, “that’s what it’s called,” then turned without further discussion and walked home to my new apartment. I don’t remember whether I cried or felt pride at having stood up to him, but I remember that each step felt closer to freedom. Somehow, I would be okay, maybe even begin to heal and find happiness.

A smile crept across my face today as I heard the song again, all these years later. Not only had I been okay, I had begun to discover that I didn’t need to settle in life and that I deserved so much more than the abuses I had endured. A newer, happier, me had emerged along the way. I mouthed the lyrics feeling pride at the strength I had shown all those years ago: “It’s my life. Don’t you forget.”

Go Back

Comment

Discover these amazing products that heal at the cellular level, destroying harmful free radicals linked to aging.

Discover these amazing products that heal at the cellular level, destroying harmful free radicals linked to aging.

Discover these amazing products that heal at the cellular level, destroying harmful free radicals linked to aging.

Discover Ageless Beauty

Discover these amazing products that heal at the cellular level, destroying harmful free radicals linked to aging.

Help Save the Lost Orchard

Help Michelle save the historic apple trees in the Lost Orchard with your donation (any size helps!).

New E-Book: FOOD FIX

Discover Dr. Cook's New E-Book Food Fix

 

Get FREE Health Tips, Recipes and more from Dr. Cook

Add your e-mail address here.

SAVE 20% on Dr. Cook's E-Books

Save 20% on Dr. Cook's EBooks. Use coupon code SPG20 at checkout. 

The Life Force Diet: 3 Weeks to Supercharge Your Health and Get Slim with Enzyme-Rich Foods

Healing Recipes

Cancer-Proof: All-Natural Solutions for Cancer Prevention and Healing

The Phytozyme Cure: Treat or Reverse More than 30 Serious Health Conditions with Powerful Plant Nutrients

Acid-Alkaline Food ChartAcid Alkaline Chart of Foods

Healing Injuries Naturally: How to Mend Bones, Strengthen Joints, Repair Tissue, and Alleviate Pain

Everything You Need to Know about Healthy Eating

More Books by Dr. Cook